BDSM tips for everyone to enjoy
Goooooooood morning lovely readers of the Goddess Blog and welcome to another Monday and another lovely read ahead of you courtesy by your favorite Goddess, and for today I will be sharing several BDSM tips for everyone out there to enjoy - yes, that means that the tips will even be beginner friendly, so stick around for today’s post lovely ladies and gents, enjoy the read, and as always, remember to spoil your Goddess with some lovely cups of coffee along the way if you enjoy the content!
Few things in life are as misunderstood as BDSM. The sex practice is often accused of being physically or mentally harmful, something that only survivors of abuse embrace, or abnormally kinky. But it's important for beginners to understand that it’s actually none of those things.
If you’re a BDSM beginner, it can be tough to imagine BDSM as anything but a Red Room (thanks, Fifty Shades) with chains and whips to excite you (à la Rihanna). And though the practice typically does involve props, they don't make an appearance right off the bat. Instead, as a beginner, you'll want to take things slowly until you figure out what BDSM looks like for you and your partner(s), since someone else's methods won't necessarily get you going.
Having said that, here are some general BDSM tips that the Goddess provides for you guys, in no particular order:
1. Start With A Fantasy
A lot of couples make the same mistake: They go to a sex shop, grab a few toys, and then come back and decide that BDSM just isn’t for them. Instead, it’s better to start with figuring out what’s hot and sexy for you. Don’t be afraid to start with your own imagination and what turns you on. Not sure what does it for you? Try reading some BDSM stories that have power themes or watching ethical porn that has BDSM to see what you might be into.
2. Talk It Out
Sit down with your partner and have an honest conversation about your desires, what turns you on, and what your boundaries are. Understand that this convo, which is incredibly important before trying any type of BDSM (or any sex act, really) must be done face-to-face, since eye contact is how we communicate empathy.
Because BDSM typically involves surrendering control, trust and communication is everything. It's extremely important that you're as specific as possible with your partner about what you want and don't want, as they should be with you. For example, let them know if the idea of being blindfolded excites you but having your hands cuffed makes you anxious. Similarly, hear them out if they tell you they never want to be in a submissive role.
3. Write It Down
Remember how Christian Grey and Anastasia had a written contract? It actually wasn't a horrible idea. Since BDSM is all about communication, communication, and communication, it might be helpful to write down what you and your partner discuss in a contract of sorts—even if you're dating or married.
This way you'll have something to refer to when you need a refresher on your partner's boundaries. As you get more comfortable with BDSM and want to take it further, you can come back to your contract, renegotiate, and make amendments. P.S. This can be kind of fun—not weird or transactional—because it ups the excitement for what's to come (emphasis on come).
4. Pick A Setting
Part of a BDSM game plan is picking a spot to do the deed . That might be a hotel on your next vacation (where it might be easier to tap into a different persona), a room reserved for power-play sex, or just your boring old bedroom. As long as it's a place you feel safe, you're good to go.
5. Shopping
BDSM is exciting in its own right, but bringing in toys and props can take the fun up a notch. Head to a sex store with your partner and let your imagination run wild. You might load up on restraints, chain nipple clamps, vibrators, paddles, anal beads, and/or lube to help you better lean into your agreed-upon roles.
This is all about pleasure, so stock up on anything that will make you and your partner feel good.
6. Dress Up
The same way props and toys can bring out your dominant side or the masochist in you, dressing the part can be just as helpful in setting the scene. For example, if you're the submissive during the experience, you might try a choker—or a cat mask and tail—to represent your willingness to obey your "owner" during the session.
Have fun with it! You don't need to go all-out, but if a little costume or accessory helps you channel your inner sex goddess, wear it proudly.
7. Go Slowly, Take Your Time
You can talk and plan all you want to, but most of the time, in the moment, there will be a little tripping point. This makes going slowly essential. You can familiarize yourself with which moves might be too rough for you or your partner and decide whether or not you actually enjoy, say, having your hair pulled during doggy.
8. Don’t Rush
It’s easy to get so ramped up at the idea of trying BDSM that you want to dive in with everything ASAP. But I recommend slowing your roll. Don’t feel you need to try everything at once. The kinky sex all-you-can-eat buffet is constantly being replenished and you can come back for as many rounds as you’d like.
Try out one BDSM aspect at a time and then break down your wildest fantasy into manageable parts. For example, if you’re craving sex in public, lots of props, spanking, and submission, maybe try incorporating just one of them into your regular rotation at a time. You might gradually move sex into a semi-public space, like a balcony or backyard, or before beginning to try new props and power play. Too much novelty at once can overwhelm your senses and intensify anxiety to a level at which arousal becomes impossible.
So there you have it boys and girls - now go make your Monday a BDSM special day! :)))
Goddess is out for the day lovely ladies and gents, I hope you liked the read! I will be seeing you all tomorrow with a brand new post, take care lovely peopleeee!
xxxx
