The best foreplay tips
Morning lovely readers of the Goddess blog and welcome to another post by yours truly - and today I will be sharing the best foreplay tips for you guys to embrace and share with your beloved partners! I firmly believe that you are going to like today’s read - and if that proves to be the case, I dare you to drop some coffees for this Goddess!! :D Let’s get into the post itself!
If you’re one to mindlessly rush through foreplay — or have a habit of skipping it entirely — know that you’re missing out. Adding more of it to your repertoire can make your sex life a whole lot better. I like to think of foreplay as really creating that erotic connection and focusing on stimulation — both yours and your partner or partners’ — and just kind of enjoying the ride of arousal! Without any further ado and in no particular order, here are the 12 best foreplay tips:
1. Start by being a good partner outside of the bedroom.
For way too long, common conceptions of foreplay focused on the minutes prior to penetration: lick here, touch there, kiss this, whisper that. Foreplay also includes daily events where you demonstrate a desire for your partner as a person: showing up in ways that make life easier for your partner — doing a load of laundry, taking the kids to the park, making sure bills are paid on time — and certainly ensuring that you’re not doing shit that makes life harder, like breaking promises or being unreliable. Kindness and consideration are sexy!
2. Reveal your secret kinky fantasies to each other.
Play a little game of confession with each other and share a kinky fantasy that you’d like to try, but are perhaps a bit nervous about. Then choose a night to ‘make’ one another take the leap! Sometimes having a little encouragement is all we need to really go there. Just play it safe, communicate and set up a safe word in advance if needed.
3. Tap into all five senses: sight, sound, taste, touch and scent.
It keeps us present in the intimate moments that matter most. For example, when you’re making out with your partner, listen to their breathing. The way they hold their breath in anticipation of what you’re going to do next or the pleasure sounds they make as their body relaxes into your embrace. Sometimes a perfume or even laundry detergent can have a pleasant impact on the way you fit together during foreplay.
Getting in a mirror and watching the way their face reacts to your touch is a supremely underrated experience as well. Pay attention to the softness of the lips, the firmness of the nipples against the wetness of the tongue or the smoothness of their skin. Being sensual adds layers to the pleasure and makes foreplay more engaging for everyone.
4. Send some saucy sexts earlier in the day to set the mood.
You can engage in foreplay before you physically meet up. Mentally stimulating your partner beforehand is underrated foreplay. Imagine how excited you would feel reading a hot message from your lover. Words of their desire for you, hints or straight-up detailing what they fantasize about doing later. That builds excitement before you’re actually together.
5. Play hard to get.
Since foreplay is really about increasing erotic desire, sometimes that can be done by building up to the sexual experience by letting them know that can’t have you. If you have something planned, for example, start sending texts or pics during the day of what they won’t be getting later. Even while you are both already preparing or getting undressed, continue to playfully deny. This kind of teasing can be suspense-building and kick the passion up several notches.
6. Suggest a game of strip poker.
People definitely know about strip poker and other variations on strip games, but likely don’t have them in their go-to foreplay routines. Playing strip poker or another goofy game you add stripping to is such an amazing way to add playfulness and flirtation into your encounter and bring back some of that early relationship spark!
7. Figure out which stressors in your lives are messing with your desire. Then try to eliminate a few of them.
Learn about the dual control model of arousal, or what I call the ‘gas and brakes’ of your sexual arousal. Remember: Better sex isn’t always about adding more excitement. Most people focus too much on pouring on the gas of arousal while forgetting to take pressure off the brakes.
Explore what’s putting the brakes on your ability to relax into the pleasures of foreplay. Some brakes we can control easier than others. It is far easier to manage the distractions of dirty sheets or asking your partner to shower before initiating sex than it is to get a new job that doesn’t drain you. But even taking a little pressure off the brakes can go a long way.
8. Objectify each other on purpose.
I know, I know. Objectification’s becomes a dirty word. People’s minds naturally go to the eons where us women, in particular, have been objectified exclusively for their sexuality. Nevertheless, viewing one’s partner and being viewed by one’s partner as a sexual object is essential for desire. Of course, no one wants to only be objectified. People are complex and multilayered; they want to be appreciated for their many attributes. Nevertheless, if you’re not objectifying your partner and encouraging your partner to objectify you, then desire will elude you.
9. Go skinny-dipping.
Getting naked in the water can feel super sexy. You get bonus points for sneaking around a hotel, your apartment complex or even late night at the beach.
10. Read erotica together.
While cuddling or during mutual masturbation, have one partner read the other erotica poetry, or take turns reading sections of an erotic anthology. It can be incredibly intimate, help get you into a sexy mood and give you inspiration for things you’d like to explore together. This is also a great idea for long-distance couples or partners who can’t see each other because of the COVID-19 guidelines. Simply open FaceTime and get to it!
11. Slow things way, way down.
It can be all too easy to rush through sex, eager to take advantage of the opportunity. But rushing through pleasure doesn’t leave us satisfied. Slow everything down. Linger on the kiss before getting naked. Lavish one another in full-body massage. It takes confidence to slow down, and the less you rush the more you will feel.
12. Experiment with temperature play.
With temperature play, you’ll stimulate the sensory nerves on your skin, heightening arousal. For the cooler side, try experimenting with ice cubes or putting dildos — especially glass ones! — in the freezer. For the warmer side, try dripping wax from a candle on each other’s body or using a warming lube.
That is it for today’s post guys! I hope you had a blast and are ready to devour and use all of the knowledge the Goddess passed to you :))
Cya all tomorrow,
xxxx
